Germany was a bit different than France, in almost all regards. For instance, our forced removal from France was in December - we arrived at Kaiserslautern on a Sunday I believe. Monday morning my sister and I were arrested for not being in school! Yeah. Just playing on the swing set at the hotel and boom! off to police holding. As Germany was to prove, it was not the friendliest of places to live, unless you appreciate complete control freaks.
It was also the place where father changed radically. In Portland, following the Cuban Missile Crisis, father was rarely to be found. In France he was around the home a great deal of the time. But, in Germany, he was gone for most of the time on Temporary Duty Assignments. Yes the world was a crazy place in 1967 and 1968. We knew where he was to be, we usually knew what was going on from the news, but his absences to those places often ran weeks longer than the actual news event. It was mystifying to this young man.
On the plus side, mother suffered no more almost fatal "accidents". But she did become the family control freak - attempting to micro-manage a teen male and that did not go very well - especially since she was barely twice my age as it was! Of course, when father was home I would catch hell and he became increasingly physically abusive.
There had been times in Portland when I can remember he would come home and just beat the tar out of me, whip me until I bled, for some ill thought out prank. But, there was once I could agree that I had that level of punishment coming. That was the time I pulled a knife on him to protect myself from phase II of his abuse. Bad idea, when you do not really know how to use a knife for defense. In Germany, it became worse. I swear if I opened my mouth, it was going to be filled with his fist. That little arrest incident over playing on the hotel swings, brought on one of the most unjust of all beatings - especially since my sister received no punishment at all. Somehow, I was to have known better than to play in a playground on a Monday morning..... So I tried to stay away from him and the family as much as possible. Oh yeah, I was beaten for that as well.
And honestly, I have no idea what our being in Germany had to do with his escalating violence towards me in particular. But, even Germany itself was not exactly a great place back then either - as I will discuss later.
Monday, December 27, 2010
Monday, December 20, 2010
Deportation
In the world of politics, relations between America and France deteriorated tremendously - thanks to the US Ambassador, Sargent Shriver. As read in the Stars and Stripes, as well as pieced together from adult conversations: Shriver had a son whom was 14 at the time. Said kid in 1966 stole a car, went for a joyride and ended up killing an old woman walking along side the road. DeGaulle confronted Shriver over this and the conversation turned ugly. DeGaulle suggested that if the US could not control its children, then maybe they needed to leave French soil by the end of 1967. Shriver countered that if DeGaulle could not appreciate all the US was doing for France then perhaps the US needed to leave by May 1967. DeGaulle then issued an order that all NATO facilities were to be closed as of April (26th as I remember) 1967.
Of course the French were outraged by this. It was just more fuel for the French nationalist fires burning over America's entrance into the Vietnam conflict, a French territory. Local villagers where I lived rose up in arms and slaughtered several of the NATO children living across the canal from us - amongst them my only English speaking friend.
Things had become so messy that by December 1966, we were escorted off French soil by machine gun toting policeman - all the way to the German border. They were actually quite nice officers, had lunch with us, were very apologetic, etc.
Of course, change is evil and for those suffering with mental problems, change manifests evil..... And father was not alone in getting a share of mother's difficulties.
Of course the French were outraged by this. It was just more fuel for the French nationalist fires burning over America's entrance into the Vietnam conflict, a French territory. Local villagers where I lived rose up in arms and slaughtered several of the NATO children living across the canal from us - amongst them my only English speaking friend.
Things had become so messy that by December 1966, we were escorted off French soil by machine gun toting policeman - all the way to the German border. They were actually quite nice officers, had lunch with us, were very apologetic, etc.
Of course, change is evil and for those suffering with mental problems, change manifests evil..... And father was not alone in getting a share of mother's difficulties.
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
France - Further Strain
Heeding his friends wisdom, father applied for and got a posting to France. His hope was to get mother to become less of a control freak and more dependent upon him. Best laid plans as they say.
At the time, for some unknown reason, father utterly freaked out when we landed in France. He went from normal to completely unable to speak for many weeks! And he spoke French fluently, but with having lost his voice, we were dead in the water. Something in father's past I assume caused this but I have no idea what stressed him to that level, just by landing in Paris.
Mother really did not do very well in France. She refused to learn French, speak anything other than English and began rapidly becoming very 'odd' - like yelling at the French in English so they could hear her better. Little things like leaving the house were only done when she was to drive to the nearest NATO base for shopping. She formed no relations with any of the neighbors, except one old couple whom would watch my sister and I after school. Yeah, odd.
My parents marriage must have begun deteriorating badly as father did some mighty odd things himself. There were a series of 'accidents' which almost killed mother. Were they accidents? Or were they planned? Mother was convinced that father was trying to kill her - the NATO police did not agree. But, the grilling father got only made him more angry with her.
Within a short period of time, a kerosene heater failed and almost killed her due to carbon-monoxide poisoning. Father was affected too but not near as bad as mother was. Mistake, equipment failure or by design?
Father set a trip wire on the stairs which went up to the attic where mother hung the clothes in winter time. She darn near broke her neck coming back down the stairs! I know father did that because I saw him setting it but was too naive at the time to figure that one out! The police never talked to me about that and I was ultimately blamed for it! That was one was by design, which makes me wonder at the other incidents!.
A short time later, mother was driving to the local NATO base and one of the wheels came off of the car. The only reason mother survived the crash was a tractor had pulled out onto the road and she slowed down from 60 to 20 before the parting of the wheel from the car. Again, another accident? NATO police blamed the local communist party. But, where did they get a non-metric lug wrench for a car? American bolts do not match up with metric tools well and the nut heads were in good shape. No, that had to be father or another American in the area.
But why do this at all? I can not believe that he was planning on returning to Monika.....
My first indication that mother had lost it was when we were vacationing in Spain in 1966. One morning she, out of the blue, started screaming and hollering about how we had to return home that day, immediately! It was all very unpleasant and father drove us non-stop all the way from the Spanish coast to northern France in one horrible 27 hour drive! Mother screaming, no words, just screaming the entire time! Father so angry he bit the stem of his pipe in half, us kids cowering in the back seat. Lord only knew what would happen next! It was that bad.
Definitely, whatever it was that set her off, she remained 'odd' for the rest of her life. One would at this point suppose that another change might help. As it was world politics were about to provide a change of scenery for her and massive trauma for father. Us kids were just plain screwed.....
At the time, for some unknown reason, father utterly freaked out when we landed in France. He went from normal to completely unable to speak for many weeks! And he spoke French fluently, but with having lost his voice, we were dead in the water. Something in father's past I assume caused this but I have no idea what stressed him to that level, just by landing in Paris.
Mother really did not do very well in France. She refused to learn French, speak anything other than English and began rapidly becoming very 'odd' - like yelling at the French in English so they could hear her better. Little things like leaving the house were only done when she was to drive to the nearest NATO base for shopping. She formed no relations with any of the neighbors, except one old couple whom would watch my sister and I after school. Yeah, odd.
My parents marriage must have begun deteriorating badly as father did some mighty odd things himself. There were a series of 'accidents' which almost killed mother. Were they accidents? Or were they planned? Mother was convinced that father was trying to kill her - the NATO police did not agree. But, the grilling father got only made him more angry with her.
Within a short period of time, a kerosene heater failed and almost killed her due to carbon-monoxide poisoning. Father was affected too but not near as bad as mother was. Mistake, equipment failure or by design?
Father set a trip wire on the stairs which went up to the attic where mother hung the clothes in winter time. She darn near broke her neck coming back down the stairs! I know father did that because I saw him setting it but was too naive at the time to figure that one out! The police never talked to me about that and I was ultimately blamed for it! That was one was by design, which makes me wonder at the other incidents!.
A short time later, mother was driving to the local NATO base and one of the wheels came off of the car. The only reason mother survived the crash was a tractor had pulled out onto the road and she slowed down from 60 to 20 before the parting of the wheel from the car. Again, another accident? NATO police blamed the local communist party. But, where did they get a non-metric lug wrench for a car? American bolts do not match up with metric tools well and the nut heads were in good shape. No, that had to be father or another American in the area.
But why do this at all? I can not believe that he was planning on returning to Monika.....
My first indication that mother had lost it was when we were vacationing in Spain in 1966. One morning she, out of the blue, started screaming and hollering about how we had to return home that day, immediately! It was all very unpleasant and father drove us non-stop all the way from the Spanish coast to northern France in one horrible 27 hour drive! Mother screaming, no words, just screaming the entire time! Father so angry he bit the stem of his pipe in half, us kids cowering in the back seat. Lord only knew what would happen next! It was that bad.
Definitely, whatever it was that set her off, she remained 'odd' for the rest of her life. One would at this point suppose that another change might help. As it was world politics were about to provide a change of scenery for her and massive trauma for father. Us kids were just plain screwed.....
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
Control Freak
I have mentioned in the past that I was a very aware young man, much to my parents dismay. I could see, hear, reason and then understand a great deal far in advance of my years. One of my many observations revolved around my parents marriage. All was not well.
Father could tolerate no dust, no disturbance in his life! So he would hide nickels around the house and then upon returning home, inspect the house to be sure all of the nickels had been accounted for as well the house work done to his satisfaction! This went so far as to the proper tautness of the blankets on our beds and both my sister and I were inspected every afternoon for having achieved this. Failure to do so ended with increasingly painful punishments.
I was not allowed to wear tennis shoes and so my shoes had to be inspected every evening as well. Apparently this one task I excelled in and so by the time I was eight, he had me doing his shoes every evening. Mandatory spit shine. Okay I will admit that on occasion I would blow my nose on his shoes. He never knew the difference and it gave me pleasure not to spit on his shoe but give him a snot shine....
Father was not an native English speaker, mother was, and she was constantly correcting him. It became a power point for her to hold over him. Also, she would choose the worse possible foods - things she knew he hated. Think rutabagas, turnips and parsnips! I am violently made ill by even the smell of them ... father was merely irritated by them. It was just one more of many points of contest between them.
And someone amongst father's friends suggested that he should put the shoe on the other foot and completely remove her from her comfort zone. Oh yeah, that one is going to teach her a lesson, right?
Father could tolerate no dust, no disturbance in his life! So he would hide nickels around the house and then upon returning home, inspect the house to be sure all of the nickels had been accounted for as well the house work done to his satisfaction! This went so far as to the proper tautness of the blankets on our beds and both my sister and I were inspected every afternoon for having achieved this. Failure to do so ended with increasingly painful punishments.
I was not allowed to wear tennis shoes and so my shoes had to be inspected every evening as well. Apparently this one task I excelled in and so by the time I was eight, he had me doing his shoes every evening. Mandatory spit shine. Okay I will admit that on occasion I would blow my nose on his shoes. He never knew the difference and it gave me pleasure not to spit on his shoe but give him a snot shine....
Father was not an native English speaker, mother was, and she was constantly correcting him. It became a power point for her to hold over him. Also, she would choose the worse possible foods - things she knew he hated. Think rutabagas, turnips and parsnips! I am violently made ill by even the smell of them ... father was merely irritated by them. It was just one more of many points of contest between them.
And someone amongst father's friends suggested that he should put the shoe on the other foot and completely remove her from her comfort zone. Oh yeah, that one is going to teach her a lesson, right?
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